RAISON D'ETRE

if the next world is so superior to this one why are we still so attracted to this ... you might see it in energetic people ... healthy people live well in this world and energy comes from good health which is an excuse sufficient in itself for enjoying life ... so perhaps what I mean to say is how the pathology of the attraction interests me now ... especially over a long life span when more and more unpleasantness is likely to be encountered ... more and more enervating unsolved dilemmas ... why then this muted but powerful attraction to life on this earth when it's such a paltry thing compared to what must follow ... it's tempting to smile at this human as well as inhuman incongruity and let it go at that ... but that would be perhaps to give up too soon ... is there perhaps a sense in which this life is not inferior and not paltry in comparison with its consequent ... a reason to live worthy of a better life to follow ... down to the last twisted drop of poison wrung from the broken heart of ruined nature ... your nature flat on its back under the network of tubes your thumb up to signify the reason ... struggle ... still struggle ... to hold on to truth