A PERVERSE DETERMINATION

what if the problem is not sacramental ... what if you're just pretending that it is ... what if the problem is something else ... like sin ... I don't know it's just a guess but suppose all sin represented hiding money away in a corner ... something you're pretty damn sure you should not be doing ... this building an ark of your own for the next great rain ... this floating safe you expect will keep you afloat ... made of assumption and desire ... of presumption and yes a little lust ... a buoyant thing at first how long will your reserve last bobbing on the waves like that before you sink into your own little hole on the bottom of the ocean with the whole weight of it on top of you designed now to keep you right there ... well enough to say your salvation is in your conversion still ... to swim up to the surface ... but the water is dark deep and oh so heavy ... where will you get the strength to rise ... the strength of your treasure was in its power to descend ... its solidity ... it has no levity of purpose ... that was just a mistake ... it was simply the perversion of purpose ... to turn a thing before its time ... to twist tight the neck of your resolve ... to silence it ... to keep it there ... there